Nov update. Blog/msg to self

Hello Calvin.
It's been a long while since I blogged.
Things.. have been happening since our 20th birthday.

You didn't know the impact of your action, did you?
All you ever did was want to get him off your back.
Let me tell you, it worked.

You felt that he was using you and what you thought was friendship was naught.
You were right. You were right to get rid of that 'friendship'.
Carine saw, perceived, & warned you.

We thought in permitting him the knowledge to know the contents of our birthday present, he'd leave.
Though you both have the same box, you knew that he knew which was his box but yet you tempt him to look at the contents of our box knowing that curiosity will get the better (or worse) part of him.

After the that you both didn't talk much. It was after KBU's lantern festival that after he took a 40min trip from one utama to drop you home that you decided to never talk to him. Ever again concerning ---- .
blahblahblah

You pushed and drift away from ah miao cause you felt used too, by her.
When distanced, a void is created. And it needs to be filled. Hence, her coming into the picture.
October 7th: AKCQ~
November 4th: Love Rosie

With drama happening socially: ex, Slacking Group, you didn't know who to trust. And it seemed that everyone from the Slacking Group hates her and you. Well I'm here to tell you that it isn't true. Its just him & ah miao who has a grudge on you and her respectively.

August has passed. So has September and October. Here, November is coming to an end. You must steel yourself. Your ex's birthday is around the corner. Harden yourself. You know what making contact with her would do. It will be a bloody cycle and a waste of time again. Hang in there and stay cold.

You lied. To him. To her. To everyone but to God and yourself.
These "Study Sleepovers".... I don't have to go further.
You feel no remorse for failure, you've become numb.

The future is uncertain, the people's motives are unknown. Be the greatest liar and the better king. You are the only one who knows, so take the wheel and man up. Be more understanding but know when a person is taking advantage of you. Watch the eyes, the body language. You know the signs.

Remember not to slack off in your academics. You cannot undo the past, must not repeat it. You need to set your future. Do not fail year3. Ace it. Sweat and sacrifice. It will not come easy. If you're not feeling it, you're taking it easy. Word hard. For the both of us.

Take care, till next time..
Saturday 22nd Nov '14